Random thoughts

I could also call these, Deep Thoughts by Megan Burgess. Although they're not nearly as good as my beloved Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey.

• I heard about a lady finding a decomposing snake head in her salad. I WOULD DIE. Seriously. I'm not overreacting here. Just hearing that almost made me convulse. Ahhh, so gross!
  

• Lindsay Lohan should probably stop doing these Marilyn Monroe photoshoots. She has um...nothing in common with Marilyn. Marilyn could sing, act, and was always stunning. Lindsay cannot sing, used to act, and is stunning like, never. Someone give her a big dose of reality, please.

• I heard a radio commercial for CSI yesterday. The guy said, "There's a load of cocaine coming in from Mexico." So I said, in my best man voice, "There's a load of cocaine coming in from Mexico. But it's infected with the swine flu so don't touch it."